December 14, 2012

Blog: Squeegee unites father, son

James Bright
The Express-Star

CHICKASHA — Given that my last blog was the subject of some controversy, today I decided to pick a topic that I imagine everyone can find some joy in; favorite Christmas memory.

Sure, this isn't the hair raising, or ground breaking topic I usually reserve my opinion wiring for, but it's still interesting.

My favorite memory is something of an odd one. I was 11 or 12 and I was closing out a store in a mall that my father managed. It was three days before Christmas and stress levels were high.

At the end of the day, my father and I counted the register and prepared the store for the next day's business. Naturally everything went wrong. The register was short, a drawer wouldn't close properly and for whatever reason the front door's lock was malfunctioning. When we finally completed all these extra tasks I headed for one last bathroom break before the 30-minute drive home.

As i opened the door to the lavatory I was greeted with the foulest of stenches and a floor filled with fecal matter - we would later find out this incident was due to the employees of a women's apparel store next door flushing their tampons down the toilet, which in turn caused the one in my Dad's shop to overflow.

Anyway, my father and I located a squeegee and went to work. After our first foray into the world of feces removal, we aimed to empty the squeegee into the toilet. When my father pulled the release the mechanism broke and the squeegee fell into two pieces around the pot.

My father and I looked at each other, exhausted by the day's events and burst into laughter. The squeegee's destruction had sent us over the edge.

Now you may be asking, "Why this is my favorite Christmas story?" It's certainly unconventional and it definitely borders on gross, but it brought my father and I closer together unlike any gift, or any holiday adventure. It's a Christmas memory that I will always cherish simply because of the mutually shared irritation of the day.

I have plenty of other joyous, and definitely more conventional holiday memories involving my father and Christmas, but every year, this one sticks out.